Tag Archives: Love

Finding Your Corner Piece

*This is a creative piece of writing from the vivid depths of my imagination, character traits are accentuated and anecdotes embellished in order to make it more palatable for the audience.

A few months ago a close, at times judgemental friend of mine labelled me ‘shallow’ for rejecting the advances of a female suitor who I wasn’t physically attracted to.

In some ways his objections served as a mirror to his own insecurities; he’d dated a girl for a while before one day deciding he wasn’t actually that into her and abruptly calling time on their short-lived romantic liaison.

He was persistent and unflinching in his opinion, but he was also naive, as are so many who are cradled by the Isle of Wight’s blinkered borders. There’s an important distinction in the gaps between ‘shallow’ and ‘logical’, just as there is in those sandwiched by black and white or acid and alkali.

I had initially been drawn to the back of her, gazing from afar as she stood by a dusty typewriter, trying to think of something witty to tap onto the paper for a piece of performance art, but as time lapsed and we accrued more hours in each others’ company at all manner of destinations, I came to realise that the attraction was heavily weighted on one side and that although I enjoyed hanging out in small doses, our union wasn’t destined for a portrayal on the big screen any time soon; more ‘Blind Panic’ than Titanic.

My friend enquired over the reasons for the parting of ways, I told him the truth – I wasn’t attracted to her as a person in a romantic sense, at which point he dropped the ‘S’ bomb on me, seemingly perturbed rather than jovial.

What he refused to muse upon for a moment was the chapters that had unfolded before the alleged jilting that concluded our courtship. That for every time she rocked up at my workplace unannounced, growing fonder, becoming more porous and allowing my essence to seep deeper into her pores (ok, that sounds more disgusting than I anticipated) my own interest was dwindling.

The first red flags appeared when we went for a walk on a humid, but by no means hot, afternoon, an activity I enjoy as an outdoorsy kinda chap. Within a few minutes she was puffing heavily and sweating profusely, her upper lip drenched in sticky, glistening secretion.

Roughly every ten minutes of walking were followed by an enforced rest for 15, each pause punctuated by her repetitious two word utterance that gradually sapped my vitality: “getting there.” I looked at her, aged 25 and out of shape. I caressed her soggy body and felt bad for her, for us, conceding that unless she was willing to work on this aspect of herself it would become relationship euthanasia via a slow drip.

The logical brain inevitably took over as I became damp from her perspiration, the odour now tickling my gag reflex: “Is she working on that aspect of herself as a young woman who should be able to walk a little bit further?” I pondered. The answer was no, she had already openly stated that she had hated being skinny in the past and thus didn’t exercise in order to avoid losing weight.

She had purchased a push bike, but lost interest in that within the first few weeks. In addition, she had unfortunately suffered from chronic back pain since her teenage years and this was only likely to diminish her physical activity as she got older.

If she was slightly out of shape but mobile it wouldn’t have been an issue. I liked her eyes, they were kind and vulnerable, hidden behind thick lenses. I liked that she became more liberated as we hung out, I liked… I liked her, but this was a gaping chasm that couldn’t be filled with likes, it wasn’t a Facebook status or a video on YouTube, it was our lives.

I was disappointed, she seemed to understand initially, but quite soon decided not to speak to me any more or respond to greetings on social media. I don’t think she could accept my rationale, but it would have been like trying to cram a Jaffa cake into the corner of a jigsaw puzzle to compensate for a missing piece. In the short term I might have filled that gaping hole, but with inevitability maggots and mould were on the way.

Within 48 hours of me articulating to her the feelings that occupied the deepest marshes of my psyche, she announced a new relationship on her Facebook page, my overriding emotion was joy, for her, for him. I knew the guy and he was her corner piece.

To the friend who looked down at my shallowness, I explained that my decision was not “she’s unattractive, thus I will not date her”, I liked this girl, she wasn’t some sort of Barbie doll. She had a good heart and seemed damaged, I wanted to protect her, serve as a catalyst for her to blossom into a confident woman full of vitality.

My decision was based on her inability to do things with me that were pivotal to my existence on this rotating sphere we humans populate. By the same token, I didn’t exactly leap at the prospect of flopping in bed watching Star Wars marathons for 16 hours. Ergo: I was as poor a choice for her as she was for me, she just didn’t realise at the time. That’s the best I can explain it really.

This is all obvious when you think about it. Those who attempt to entirely tear up another person’s blueprint are destined for failure or misery, even if one half of the partnership is now content, the other is effectively a neutered drone.

There is room to enhance each other of course, be it guidance towards meditation, building confidence, or healthier lifestyle choices that are realistic, maybe even just making sure each other brush their teeth twice a day.

In our case we’d have had to compromise too much, and it would have ended up clawing at the fabric of whatever bond we’d built. Her new partner is the Sonny to her Cher, the Jim to her Pam, the Jordan to her… Peter Andre? Ok, maybe that last one isn’t such a great example… And didn’t Sonny used to beat Cher? Ok, so I suck at naming famous couples, but you get the gist.

The freely condemned concept of shallowness that people propagate doesn’t apply without allowing for a caveat or three; far more is visible beneath the waves than on the crest of them after all.

From my perspective it all stems from a deep longing for ‘someone’, not in the sense of a specific being, but rather a void fragment to solve the riddle.  Knowing on a painfully visceral level that the current person whom you spend time with and who desires you isn’t fulfilling that craving, being brave/foolhardy enough to walk away. The crossroads of acceptance and liberation.

It’s seeking love, it’s the deepest form of connection, not the shallowest, it’s pure and it’s aspirational… It may also prove lonely and futile, but those are the breaks toots.

To settle, or to seek out that purity of connection? Be with anybody just to have any body wrapped around yours when your head hits the pillow at night, or have faith that a kindred spirit is hacking through the same thicket as you in pursuit of the freedom your presence will bring one another.

I’m far from soulless after all, I’m just not as drunk as most of the other people at the party.

Written by Dom Kureen

As a young rapscallion stranded on an Island, my time is split between writing, performing spoken word, wrestling alligators and delivering uplifting pep talks to hairdressers before they prune me. I meditate and wash daily when possible.

Festival season 2015: Who’s playing where this summer?

With the UK music festival season rapidly approaching, there are now more choices than ever before for the weekend raver. Dom Kureen takes a look at some of the most notable events and how they’re shaping up so far.

June

Fleetwood Mac
Fleetwood Mac will kick off festival season on the Isle of Wight.

 

Isle of Wight Festival

Venue: Seaclose Park, Isle of Wight
Dates: 11-14 June
Weekend camping price: £208

Headline acts
Fleetwood Mac, Blur, The Black Keys, The Prodigy, Max.Lyrical.

Isle of Wight Festival website
Kureen 2014 Isle of Wight Festival review 

Download Festival

Venue: Donington Park, Leicestershire
Dates: 12-14 June
Weekend camping price: £215

Headline acts
Muse, Slipknot, Kiss, Faith No More, Motley Crue

Download website

Glastonbury Festival

Venue: Worthy Farm, Pilton.
Dates: 24-28 June
Weekend camping price: £225

Headline acts
Kanye West, Lionel Richie, Foo Fighters

Glastonbury website
Kureen 2014 Glastonbury review

Wireless 10

Venue: Finsbury Park, London
Date: 28 June
Day ticket price: £76.45

Headline acts
Drake, Rita Ora, Chance the Rapper, Katy B, Public Enemy

Wireless 10 website

July

Drake
Drake goes Wireless in July

Wireless Festival

Venue: Finsbury Park, London.
Dates: 3-5 July
Weekend camping price: £209.50

Headline acts
Drake, Jesse J, Avicii, Mary J Blige, David Guetta

Wireless Festival website

T2015

Venue: Strathallan castle, Perthshire, Scotland
Dates: 10-12 July
Weekend camping price: £194

Headline acts
Kasabian, Sam Smith, The Libertines, Kasabian, The Prodigy

T2015 website

Latitude Festival

Venue: Henham Park, Southwold, Suffolk
Dates: 16-19 July
Weekend camping price: £200.50

Headline acts
Portishead, Noel Gallagher’s High Flying Birds, Alt-J, Alan Davies, Jon Richardson 

Latitude website

Love Box

Venue: Victoria Park, Tower Hamlets, London.
Dates: 17-18 July
Weekend camping price: £93.50

Headline acts
Snoop Dogg, Rudimental, Bonobo, Jessie Ware, Cypress Hill

Love Box website

Secret Garden Party

Venue: Mill Hill Field, Abbots Ripton
Dates: 23-26 July
Weekend camping price: £190.50

Headline acts
Jungle, Public Service Broadcasting, Palma Violets, Menace Beach

Secret Garden Party website

August

Sam Smith
Sam Smith: Far too clean looking for the festival crowd

 

Boomtown Fair

Venue: Matterley Estate, Winchester, Hampshire
Dates: August 13-16
Weekend camping price: £155

Headline acts
Stephen Marley, Gogol Bordello, Flogging Molly

Boomtown Fair website

V Festival

Venues: Weston Park, Staffordshire / Hylands Park, Chelmsford
Dates: August 22-23
Weekend camping price: £189

Headline acts
Calvin Harris, Stereophonics, Sam Smith, Tom Jones

V Festival website

Reading and Leeds Festival

Venues: Richfield Avenue, Reading / Braham Park, Leeds
Dates: August 28-30
Weekend camping price: £205

Headline acts
Mumford and Sons, The Libertines, Limp Bizkit, Metallica

Reading Festival website
Leeds Festival website

Creamfields

Venue: Alex James’s Farm, Kingham, The Cotswolds
Dates: August 28-30
Weekend camping price: £154.50

Headline acts
Paloma Faith, Grandmaster Flash, Groove Armada

Creamfields website

September

Chemical Brothers
The Chemical Brothers sent in the clowns last summer

 

Festival No.6

Venue: Portmeirion, Wales
Dates: September 3-6
Weekend camping price: £170

Headline acts
Grace Jones, Belle & Sebastian, Ghost Poet

Festival No.6 website

Bestival

Venue: Robin Hill, Isle of Wight
Dates: September 10-13
Weekend camping price: £195

Headline acts
Chemical Brothers, Underworld, Duran Duran

Bestival website
Kureen 2014: 10 local acts you won’t want to miss

OnBlackheath

Venue: Blackheath, London
Dates: September 12-13
Weekend price: £89

Headline acts
Manic Street Preachers, Elbow, Madness

OnBlackheath website

Let us know which festival catches your eye, in the meantime here’s ‘Never going back again’ from the legendary Fleetwood Mac.

 

 

 

 

 

Written by Dom Kureen

As a young rapscallion stranded on an Island, my time is split between writing, performing spoken word, wrestling alligators and delivering uplifting pep talks to hairdressers before they prune me. I meditate and wash daily when possible.

101 great albums. No.1: Love – Forever Changes

Looking through Rolling Stone magazine’s (Beatles obsessed) top 500 albums of all time, I was more than a wee bit surprised to see a band I’d never heard of listed at number 40.

Love Forever Changes 2

Love were a group on the brink of a heavily drug induced breakup during the summer of 1967, but were coerced into recording a third and final LP by their label, Elektra, who felt that there was plenty of juice left in the (ahem) Love machine.

Widely regarded as the band’s masterpiece, Forever Changes  was slow to gain popularity in their native USA, but later became a cult classic and gained retrospective acclaim for its ground breaking, genre-juggling nature. Interestingly it was immediately embraced in Great Britain.

A largely acoustic cut, Love’s front men, Arthur Lee and Bryan Maclean, are credited with much of the unpredictability associated with the final product, the latter given most credit for the vibrancy and freshness of the sound and dexterity of lyrical acuity.

So flavoursome were the recordings that Neil Young was at one stage mooted as a possible producer, something that proved to be little more than a myth.

 

 

There are several noteworthy singles on offer here, although if there is one minor criticism it’s that the opener, “Alone Again Or”, provides the album’s zenith, with its mariachi-brass fuelled energy an unobtrusive listen, setting an implausibly lofty water mark that the rest of the album can’t quite compete with, albeit extending a commendable attempt.

Written by Dom Kureen

As a young rapscallion stranded on an Island, my time is split between writing, performing spoken word, wrestling alligators and delivering uplifting pep talks to hairdressers before they prune me. I meditate and wash daily when possible.